India is Calling Me
India is calling me again. A retreat in Rajasthan with my teacher Shakti Durga in February 2024 is exciting me. I’m in preparation mode. I can feel the energy for the retreat building. I’m gaining clarity about the possibilities of what I’m calling in, and the courage to reach deep within me to explore the sacred depths of my being. The many temples we will visit in Rajasthan each hold the concentrated energy and light of the Divine. I am open and humble, ready to receive. Each temple will hold a different vibration of energy. Some will nourish me more than others. Each will be fascinating. With curiosity and wonder I approach every new experience.
To retreat with Shakti Durga means transformation. From my experience I know this means that I will face things about myself that I don’t like. These are the stepping stones. I’ll sit in the middle of the river on the stepping stone for a while. I know I’m not alone. Shakti Durga is helping me, even though we haven’t spoken, she knows. I will feel the churn within. This is the hard part. Staying with the churn long enough, to hang in there to feel deeply. I’m not dwelling here, I’m only visiting. This is the exquisite paradox of being human. That deep pain is the flip side to freedom, of lightness of heart, of parting the mist, of joy. Facing myself, seeing myself, acknowledging whatever it is that I don’t like, often referred to as shadow self; and then loving myself with this … ah the delicate dance of growth of my spiritual self. The water flowing around me as I sit on the stepping stone is filled with healing powers of Mother Earth. The water is holding me and clarifying my insights, it’s cleansing me and lightening my load. I am ready to let go, to surrender this bit of pain that I had been holding onto. I submerge myself in the flow of the water. I am one with the earth now. Perfect with all my human frailties. I have gained the insight of wisdom. I emerge renewed. Nature is alive to me. I am a new version of myself. I’ve been upgraded, holding more light, joy bubbles within. But I am quiet. I am aware. I am grateful. I am basking in the love of my teacher, the love of the earth, of the Divine Feminine.